Why do I keep doing this?

Ran the Top of Utah half marathon ( again ) on the home front. It was just as fun as I remembered- oh wait or was is as miserable as I remember? They say running a marathon is like going through labor, it's the worst, but then there comes a time shortly after that you seem to get amnesia about all that misery and want to do it all over again- while I was running, pretty much the entire time I was thinking- why am I doing this again? I must be the stupidest person ever, look at all of us running like crazy people. It seems weird but there really is a great sense of accomplishment when's it's over. And it's good, for me, to be working for something and achieve a goal. I almost reached my goal time, it was so close! It's kind of stinks when it's that close, y'know? I wanted to maintain a 9 minute mile and so I would be breaking 2 hours but I came in at 2 hours even. I watched the time change from 1:59 to 2:00 and I was so disappointed. I hadn't done enough. But it is what it is, there were alot of factors that went into it- mentally I wasn't there. I was very overwhelmed with running 13 miles and just didn't feel prepared because the last two weeks I wasn't feeling motivated or didn't really have the energy to train. My last long run was a disaster, I finished 11 miles with a 9:50 pace and my optimism was gone after that. It happens sometimes. Running all summer, I may have just been a little burned out. I didn't eat that much and got a bad stitch in my side after mile 2, but that's didn't slow me down too bad. Just ticked me off a little. It always feels better when you can do your business before a race but no matter how many times we visited those handy huts, it just wasn't happening. I thought for sure I wouldn't get a side ache because I didn't drink any water that morning but it happened anyway. I usually would take some shot blocks or something with caffeine or sugar to feel energized in the morning. I noticed I definitely felt more sluggish this time around without it but I didn't want anything like that -I just wanted my body to be able to do it's thing. I felt pretty good until mile10, when I hit mile ten, I was under a 9 minute/mile pace, I finished the first  6 miles in about 51 minutes but I hit a wall big time at mile 11 and I could not talk myself into running 2 more miles, you would think 2 more would be nothing but when your body is done running, there's almost nothing you can do to convince it otherwise. I walked several times and slowed way down. Once you hear the crowds cheering it gives you a little boost and I was able to pick up the pace to a 9 the last half mile or so. The fact that it was downhill finally may have helped too. The whole atmosphere of a race is just really fun, all and all it was definitely worth it, we did it as a family and we have great support and they get excited and happy and they encourage each other, it's great. The weather was great. My shins didn't hurt. And I did improve my time a little so alot of improvement to be done in the future but it feels good to have done another one, even if it I didn't feel the greatest. I'm still happy I did it!almost

Do I look wasted? It's because I am.   ( Braden, my supportive and wonderful husband, and I after the run)

Look at all the runners in our family, and we are missing Cathy, Danya, and Mardee in this picture. No, I didn't run with them, they are all so fast. Michelle, Shay and Linsey all finished in around 1:50 and Kaylee finished her first half ever today and was done in less than 2:30- So impressive! Everyone is so awesome and inspires me to be better.

Here's Braden's aunt Mardee who didn't even train and managed to pull off around a 2:40 finish- crazy lady!
A little shout out to my friend Nikki who is hard core and gave me some great tips for improving my time- I'll take your advice  more serious next time and maybe we can break that 2 hour barrier I seem to be in. Thanks for all the support!  :)